I have always loved helping people. I love giving gifts and surprises and finding ways to make other people's life better. I'm not saying that I'm always the most considerate person, but I definitely do have my moments...
On the other hand, I'm not always the most gracious about accepting help. Sometimes I'm stubborn and insist on doing things myself even when I'm out of my league. Other times I want the help, but I just don't know how to graciously accept...
This is another thing cancer has taught me...Sometimes it just doesn't matter if you can graciously accept, even if you can't possibly ever repay the person(s) for all he/she/they may do for you. I feel like I have learned this lesson over and over and over this year. Ironically, the other lesson all of this has taught me is that sometimes my desire/intentions/insistence to be gracious denies others the pleasure of being helpful, and unintentionally makes me less approachable. As I've learned to ask for help and appreciate help I feel like I've learned I have more friends than I ever realized, and those friends care more than I ever realized.
I know I've always been a private person, but this whole experience has changed that. Between asking for and accepting help, and this blog, I have found a new balance.
Anyway, thank you to all of you that have done something (or multiple somethings) for me and my family during all of this...cards, meals, care packages, visits, doggy daycare, housekeeping....We can't ever repay you, but we sure as hell will try!
In the meantime I hope you were able to get the rush of happiness I get when I do something good for someone else, and also please know that we will pay all the generosity and thoughtfulness we have been gifted forward. We will also make sure that our children are raised to do the same.
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